Judge Me if You Must

Ok, so I'm going to be honest here, and if that means that people are going to judge me for it, then so be it.  After all, the blogging and reflecting are really for me first of all; if others can learn from it, then that is just an added bonus.

I've been pretty quiet on Twitter, and really all social media, lately.  I do not want to take away anything from any of the amazing educators that I have connected with, but I have found my new connections in social media to be a double-edged sword in many ways.  Let me explain.

First of all, I do want to thank everyone that shares ideas, articles and other educational information.  In many ways you helped me find a new energy and focus for my classroom.  I have probably learned more over this past summer than I have in numerous workshops that I have attended the past few years.  There are so many people out there willing to answer questions and share resources, I honestly do not know how I made it through some of my previous years of teaching without you.

Now for the dark side of the blade.  While there are many positive educators, and people in general, participating in social media, sometimes all of their great ideas make me feel inadequate.  I read about all of their successes and the innovative things they have been able to do, and honestly it makes me doubt myself as an educator.  Am I really doing enough to help my students be successful?  Am I finding ways to make my students excited about learning, especially when I am not overly excited about what we are doing that day?  Part of that is on me, and I have to realize that I have to do what I can without worrying about "keeping up with the Jones'". 

However, even with all the support I have found in social media, I feel like I often have to hold back how I am truly feeling.  Why, you may ask?  Honestly, I feel judged.  There are numerous times I have logged onto to Twitter for a pick me up and found comments that are a little disheartening.  While I am sure that these people probably do not mean for their comments to be taken that way, I have decided that I need voice my concern over these comments. 

First of all, when I see people saying things like, "If you are burned out, then you probably shouldn't be teaching anymore," it really bothers me.  While I do agree that if you feel so burned out that you hate going to school everyday, and you honestly cannot see any positives to what you do, then you probably should look for another career.  However, I do not feel that some people on social media take into consideration the variables that come into play when talking about someone's feelings about their job.  There are many days where I have felt completely kicked down to the point where I just do not know if I can keep dragging myself up. I have had days where I have just wanted to toss in the towel and walk away from it all because I know that it would probably be easier for me mentally in many ways.  As educators I feel that many of us pour so much of ourselves into our jobs that we cannot help but feel burned out from time to time.  If you are constantly giving of yourself there are bound to be points you will reach that leave you feeling empty and as if you really have nothing left to give.  That being said, I also have days where I feel over-filled because I do get so much back from what I do.  I cannot think of anything more rewarding than having a struggling student find success, or to hear other students excited about what we are learning or doing in class that day.  So, even though I have times that I feel burned out, and I vent that I feel burned out, it does not mean that I should not be teaching anymore. 

The other comments that have bugged me lately are the ones that condemn worksheets and grades altogether.  Yes, in a perfect world students would be learning for the sake of learning.  Ideally I would like to not have to give grades either, but alas that is not the cards that we have been dealt.  We can continue to fight the battle, but I do not feel that it is right to belittle someone when they have a grading question because you do not feel that they should be giving grades in the first place.  As to the worksheets, just like technology, they are a tool.  Tools can be misused and abused, but they can also serve a purpose if used correctly.  I personally do not feel that we should toss the worksheet aside, but instead look at how it is being used and then have a discussion of how the tool is best used.

So those of you out there that are sometimes quick to pipe in about this topic or that with what you think other teachers should or should not be doing, I ask you to just take a minute to think first.  Take into consideration what that person is really asking for or about.  If they are on social media and asking questions they obviously care about what they are doing and trying to improve themselves, otherwise, why would the bother to take the time?  Instead of chastising them, find ways to offer assistance and pointers as they navigate their way through this quickly changing field.  They might be just starting out and changing just a few pieces at a time.  Think about the fact that you do not necessarily know them, their students, their administration and what is being required of them.  Remember that many of us wear many different hats in our positions and are trying to balance several things at once while still trying to be innovative.  Think about the workload they may have, or the challenges they are possibly facing in their classrooms that limit what they are able to do at this time.  Once again I say, judge me if you must, but do me a favor first and just think a little before you do.